Trying to get pregnant can be a very exciting venture in a couple's relationship. But for most couples, conceiving doesn't happen overnight. Often, stress, worry, and resentment begins to set in as couples start to question why they're not pregnant and who's fault it is. As a result, keeping the passion alive is a huge challenge. Today, Parents Ask expert Carin Goldstein discusses ways couples can work through this period:

Q:  My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for 8 months. My doctor says that everything is fine but I'm having a hard time getting past the frustration. Sex has become very routine--It's hard to stay excited and feel sexual knowing that my clock is literally ticking. Any suggestions on how we can keep passion alive?



A: As exciting as the "baby making" process can be, there comes a point for many couples where their eager efforts leave them unsuccessful for months on end.  As feelings of disappointment, frustration, and sadness are typical for so many couples during this time, the idea of keeping any passion alive can easily fall to the way side.  That said, here are a few important tips for couples to remember so that the connection between the two of them can stay strong:

1) Try to keep sex from becoming too mechanical and over scheduled:

- Women tend to become obsessed with the whole ovulation process and timing the sex at the exact time for "interception."  The couple can become so consumed by the end goal that they forget about experiencing sex as a pleasurable, connective experience.  If couples can try to "switch it up" a bit, that can always help! Venturing out of the bedroom, checking into a hotel room one night, or getting away for the weekend, etc. can always help couples to refocus their sexual energy with each other.

2) Remember that there is more to you as a couple than just making a baby:

- In the throws of struggling to conceive, couples tend to forget about all the special attributes they posses as solely a couple and begin to define their self worth as whether or not the wife is pregnant. Couples need to remember how much both people contribute to the world around them whether a child is in the picture or not.

3) Keep romance fresh:

- Just as romance is very alive in the beginning of most relationships, couples need to remember to foster that attention toward each other especially at a time when both are feeling the stress of trying to conceive.

4) Remember that you are both on the same team:

- I see many couples go through this process and end up on opposite ends of the rooms due to the emotional roller coaster of trying to get pregnant.  Both need as much support and understanding from each other as possible so that neither feels alone.  There is something to be said about weathering hard times together and coming out on the other end stronger as a couple and ultimately, more passionate about your relationship.