Whether you're a full time working parent, or a parent that gets to escape every now and again, hiring a caretaker for your child can be a difficult process. Though you want someone to love and adore your child as much as you do, for some parents, there is a fear that your child might love and adore the Nanny as much as they love and adore YOU. Today, Parents Ask expert Carin Goldstein, LMFT weighs in on this very common concern.

Q: Recently, the moment my nanny walks through the door, my toddler runs to her and wants nothing to do with me.  I admit to feeling jealous and can't help but wonder, does my child love the nanny more than me?  Am I doing something wrong? Help!

 

A: No. You are doing absolutely nothing wrong! In fact, it's the exact opposite and you are more than likely doing everything right: Your child feels secure enough in their attachment with you, hence why he or she feels safe enough to make a strong connection with your nanny knowing you will always be his or her home base to return to.

 

As far as feeling jealous, remember that you are not "losing" anything or being "deprived of your child" when they scream with glee upon the arrival of the babysitter or nanny. If anything it's a gain for everyone, because your child has a special playmate who he or she truly loves and you have a child who is learning to develop healthy attachments based on the solid foundation you are giving them.