The minute you have a child, the flood gates open and you are flooded with endless amounts of advice from people that... well, you really don't want to listen to. Combine endless amounts of advice with tons of family time during the holidays, and you have a slight recipe for frustration and disaster on your hands.  Today, Parents Ask expert Elizabeth Pantley, author of The No-Cry Sleep Solution offers tips to one reader who is frustrated:

Q:  Help! I’m frustrated with the endless stream of advice I get from my mother-in-law, aunt and brother! No matter what I do, I’m doing it wrong. I love them all, but how do I get them to stop with the unwanted advice?

A:  Your family doesn’t mean to annoy you -- they share advice because they care about you and your child. Knowing this may give you a reason to handle the interference gently. You can shed unwanted advice in a variety of ways:

Listen first
Chances are you’re not being criticized; rather, the other person is sharing what they feel to be valuable insight. You never know, you might learn something valuable.

Disregard 
If you know that there is no convincing the other person to change her mind, simply smile, nod, and make a non-committal response, such as, “Interesting!” Then go about your own business...your way.

Agree
You might find one part of the advice that you agree with. If you can, provide wholehearted agreement on that topic.

Pick your battles
If your mother-in-law insists that Baby wear a hat on your walk to the park, go ahead and pop one on his head. This won’t have any long-term effects except keeping the peace. However, don’t capitulate on issues that are important to you or the health or well-being of your child.

Steer clear of the topic
If your brother is pressuring you to let your baby cry to sleep, but you would never do that, then don’t complain to him about how tired you are. If he brings up the topic, then a change of subject is definitely in order.

Educate yourself
Knowledge is power; protect yourself and your sanity by reading up on your parenting choices. Rely on the confidence that you are doing your best for your baby.

Quote a doctor
Many people accept a point of view if a professional has validated it. If your pediatrician agrees with your position, say, “My doctor said to wait until she’s at least six months before starting solids.” If your own doctor doesn’t back your view on an issue, then refer to another doctor or a baby care book.

Be vague
You can avoid confrontation with an elusive response. For example, if your sister asks if you’ve started potty training yet (but you are months away from even starting), you can answer with, “We’re moving in that direction.”

Memorize a standard response
Here’s a comment that can be said in response to almost any piece of advice: “This may not be the right way for you, but it’s the right way for me.”

Search out like-minded friends
Join a support group or on-line club with people who share your parenting philosophies. Talking with others who are raising their children in a way that is similar to your own can give you the strength to face people who don’t understand your viewpoints.